This is an absolutely hilarious parody of Welcome to the Jungle, purportedly of ex-Van Halen windpipes David Lee Roth auditioning for Slash's (of Guns N' Roses fame) new band, Slash's Snakepit. Somehow DLR got it alll wronggg by mixing up GN'R's flagship anthem Welcome to the Jungle with his own Van Halen runaway hit, Runnin' with the Devil. My pathetic attempt at a transcript of this dialogue is as follows. Enjoy.
Slash: Alright Dave. Did you get the f*ckin words I sent ya?
DLR: Y-yeah we're good, I'm ready
Slash: Ready to Rock?
DLR: I'm ready Splash
Slash: Right Snakepit's gonna be f*ckin hot, alright?
DLR: Can we talk about this name later there Smash?
Slash: Uh-hey, ya know, for somebody that's not currently working... I don't think you should put any intimidating f*ckin' demands on me
DLR: Ok yea sure
Slash: Don't be a d*ck like Axl, alright?
DLR: Whatever you say pal, let's just get this thing rollin'
Slash: Alright let's f*ckin hit it, playback on three, aaand... Playback!
Slash: F*ckin Cut... Eh what the f*ck was that, man?
DLR: Uhh... I uh uh dropped the lyrics, yeah
Slash: Yeah it's no wonder you're f*ckin unemployed, alright?
DLR: L-let's try it again there Perfection Boy
Slash: Can we playback *pause* Stu? can you get that ready again please?
Slash: Holy F*ckin S*it!
DLR: Uhh do we have a problem?
Slash: Yeah, the song is called Welcome to the Jungle? Maybe you've heard of it, or maybe you're too busy playin f*ckin casinos for people with (Van Halen reference) busted hips and... blue hair, alright?
DLR: Look pal, look pal, I'm having it with Van Halen flashbacks here, you just relax okay
Slash: Ya know I'm having (referencing GN'R's frontman Axl Rose) Axl 'The D*ckhead' Rose flashbacks alright? This is SLASH'S SNAKEPIT.
DLR: One more time
Slash:The f*ckin Snakepit.
DLR: No problem there Splash.
Slash: Alright *pause* Yeah thanks, pretty f*ckin funny. Alright on three right? and...
Slash: YOU F*CKIN D*CK!
DLR: What? That's that's what we discu... Oh, okay
Slash: No No, Welcome to the JUNGLE... alright?
DLR: Ahhh look man, you're talking to a professional here
Slash: What is this f*ckin Devil doing here...
DLR: I'm just warming up!
Slash: ...What are you like this f*ckin' Devil worshipper?
DLR: ONE MORE TIME, alright? I know what's going on
Slash: Anybody smell f*ckin sulphur in here, are we in Hell? The f*ckin Devil keeps showing up!
DLR: Get your hair out of your eyes there Stash
Slash: Yeayeayea. Suck my joint. You guys ready?
DLR: ONE MORE TIME
Slash: Playback one more time Stu, sorry man...
Axl N' Slash / David Lee Roth N' Eddie Van Halen
Slash: Y-YOU... HOLD IT, JUST F*CKIN HOLD IT!
DLR: Hey LOOK HERE PAL, this is the last time I'm gonna tell ya, I KNOW what I'm doin', it's called IMPROVISATION, I do this all the time it's worked on Record after Record after Record...
Slash: NONONO. NO, excuse me, uh if I correct you but I know what you're doin', it's called f*ckin up...
DLR: I-I...
Slash: ...alright? What the f*ck is goin' on here man?
DLR: Why don't you get a haircut, and then come back, and then you'll be able to SEE what you're SAYIN' to me there pal!
Slash: Yeah why don't YOU get a f*ckin' career alright, Loser Man?
DLR: Right look man, if you didn't have so much leather on ya...
Slash: You don't have to take this different, I'm f*ckin coming in there!
DLR: That's it man, I've had it, headphones off pal
*unknown*: Why didn't you step up to the f*ckin taco stand when they put some hot sauce in that...
*POW! BIFF! BASH! BOOM! POOF! BISH*
*unknown*: Hey! Hey!
*BAM! BONG! BISH! BOOF! BOOM! POW!*
*unknown*: That's it! That's it!
*BANG! BISH! BOM! BAF! POW! BOOM!*
Slash: Give me a handful of HAIR there pal!
*BIFF! POW! BISH! BOOM! BANG! BOM!*
*unknown*: That's right! That's right!
*unknown*: It hurts man!
*unknown*: AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
*CRASH*
*Phone Dialling*
Slash: Uh... Hello? Sammy! (referencing DLR's successor at Van Halen, Sammy Hagar) heh! Slash... uh do you know the words to Welcome to the Jungle?
DLR: Y-yeah we're good, I'm ready
Slash: Ready to Rock?
DLR: I'm ready Splash
Slash: Right Snakepit's gonna be f*ckin hot, alright?
DLR: Can we talk about this name later there Smash?
Slash: Uh-hey, ya know, for somebody that's not currently working... I don't think you should put any intimidating f*ckin' demands on me
DLR: Ok yea sure
Slash: Don't be a d*ck like Axl, alright?
DLR: Whatever you say pal, let's just get this thing rollin'
Slash: Alright let's f*ckin hit it, playback on three, aaand... Playback!
*Welcome to the Jungle plays*
DLR: *sings* WOW!Slash: F*ckin Cut... Eh what the f*ck was that, man?
DLR: Uhh... I uh uh dropped the lyrics, yeah
Slash: Yeah it's no wonder you're f*ckin unemployed, alright?
DLR: L-let's try it again there Perfection Boy
Slash: Can we playback *pause* Stu? can you get that ready again please?
*Welcome to the Jungle plays*
DLR: *sings* WOW! Runnin' with the Devil...Slash: Holy F*ckin S*it!
DLR: Uhh do we have a problem?
Slash: Yeah, the song is called Welcome to the Jungle? Maybe you've heard of it, or maybe you're too busy playin f*ckin casinos for people with (Van Halen reference) busted hips and... blue hair, alright?
DLR: Look pal, look pal, I'm having it with Van Halen flashbacks here, you just relax okay
Slash: Ya know I'm having (referencing GN'R's frontman Axl Rose) Axl 'The D*ckhead' Rose flashbacks alright? This is SLASH'S SNAKEPIT.
DLR: One more time
Slash:The f*ckin Snakepit.
DLR: No problem there Splash.
Slash: Alright *pause* Yeah thanks, pretty f*ckin funny. Alright on three right? and...
*Welcome to the Jungle plays*
DLR:*sings* WOW! Welcome to the Devil!Slash: YOU F*CKIN D*CK!
DLR: What? That's that's what we discu... Oh, okay
Slash: No No, Welcome to the JUNGLE... alright?
DLR: Ahhh look man, you're talking to a professional here
Slash: What is this f*ckin Devil doing here...
DLR: I'm just warming up!
Slash: ...What are you like this f*ckin' Devil worshipper?
DLR: ONE MORE TIME, alright? I know what's going on
Slash: Anybody smell f*ckin sulphur in here, are we in Hell? The f*ckin Devil keeps showing up!
DLR: Get your hair out of your eyes there Stash
Slash: Yeayeayea. Suck my joint. You guys ready?
DLR: ONE MORE TIME
Slash: Playback one more time Stu, sorry man...
Axl N' Slash / David Lee Roth N' Eddie Van Halen*Welcome to the Jungle plays*
DLR: *sings* WOW! Runnin' with the Jungle!Slash: Y-YOU... HOLD IT, JUST F*CKIN HOLD IT!
DLR: Hey LOOK HERE PAL, this is the last time I'm gonna tell ya, I KNOW what I'm doin', it's called IMPROVISATION, I do this all the time it's worked on Record after Record after Record...
Slash: NONONO. NO, excuse me, uh if I correct you but I know what you're doin', it's called f*ckin up...
DLR: I-I...
Slash: ...alright? What the f*ck is goin' on here man?
DLR: Why don't you get a haircut, and then come back, and then you'll be able to SEE what you're SAYIN' to me there pal!
Slash: Yeah why don't YOU get a f*ckin' career alright, Loser Man?
DLR: Right look man, if you didn't have so much leather on ya...
Slash: You don't have to take this different, I'm f*ckin coming in there!
DLR: That's it man, I've had it, headphones off pal
*unknown*: Why didn't you step up to the f*ckin taco stand when they put some hot sauce in that...
*POW! BIFF! BASH! BOOM! POOF! BISH*
*unknown*: Hey! Hey!
*BAM! BONG! BISH! BOOF! BOOM! POW!*
*unknown*: That's it! That's it!
*BANG! BISH! BOM! BAF! POW! BOOM!*
Slash: Give me a handful of HAIR there pal!
*BIFF! POW! BISH! BOOM! BANG! BOM!*
*unknown*: That's right! That's right!
*unknown*: It hurts man!
*unknown*: AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
*CRASH*
*Phone Dialling*
Slash: Uh... Hello? Sammy! (referencing DLR's successor at Van Halen, Sammy Hagar) heh! Slash... uh do you know the words to Welcome to the Jungle?
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